


Halloween Shenanigans

by Accidental_Ducky



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Under the Red Hood
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-21 18:28:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11950110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Accidental_Ducky/pseuds/Accidental_Ducky
Summary: The last thing Jason had expected when he woke up that morning was that he would be shoved into a closet while Dick fucking Grayson kidnapped his girlfriend.





	Halloween Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

  * For [psychedelicbubblegum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychedelicbubblegum/gifts).



The day had started out so normal, Anne had been staring up at him from her cocoon of blankets in the bed while he attempted to find a shirt that wasn’t dirty—they _really_ needed to make a trip down to the laundry room, giant rats be damned. It wasn’t until he bent over in just the right way as to showcase his ass that Anne even left the bed, still wrapped up in one of the numerous comforters as she comes to stand just behind him. He straightened slowly, closing his eyes as he felt her warm breath between his shoulder blades.

“Can I help you with somethin’, Annie,” he asked, muscles going slack when he felt a small hand move from his lower back to his stomach.

“I think you can,” she said, slowly turning him to face her so that she could look him in the eye. Hers were a dark brown, always reminding him of the brownies they had made every Friday when they were still kids living at Wayne Manor. “The real question is, are you up for the job?”

“I’m up for anything you throw at me.” He was cocky and arrogant, he knew that well enough, but he’d never expected Karma to call his ass out on it. No sooner than he’d pressed his lips against hers, the front door practically slams open and the last person he wanted to hear began to talk.

“Anne,” Dick yelled, boots thumping heavily against the floor. “Where’re you hiding?” Her eyes wide with what can only be described as panic, she shoves as hard as she could against Jason’s chest and sent him tumbling into the small closet, kicking the door shut right as Dick walked into the bedroom. “Uh, do you have a vendetta against closets today or…?”

“No,” she answered, and Jason could see her attempting to straighten her blanket through the slats in the door. “I just… Don’t have a good answer right now.” Dick arched a brow, casting a skeptical glance at the door behind her before meeting her gaze again. “Is there any reason in particular that you decided to barge into my apartment like you own the place?”

“Oh, yeah.” He nods as though he’d just remembered the reasoning behind interrupting what was sure to be a morning Jason wasn’t soon to forget. “It’s Halloween and Bruce went to the orphanage dressed as Batman to cheer up the kids. You know what that means.” Jason didn’t know what that means, he didn’t have a damn clue why it would lead to Dick breaking into Anne’s apartment despite the very real danger of the drug addict next door bashing his head in with a laptop.

“I completely forgot the date! Give me a second to get dressed!” Dick nods and heads back into the living room, leaving Anne and Jason alone again. She yanks the door open, ignoring Jason as she starts rummaging around in the back.

“So, can I come out now,” he asked, watching on with vague interest as she continued her search. Anne moves to look along the floor, going so far as to lift Jason’s foot when she got to it. “What are you looking for?”

“Costume.”

“It’s in the storage closet.”

“Not for Whirlwind, for Halloween.”

“You have a Halloween costume? Seriously?” She gives him an unimpressed look as she stands again, using him as a ladder so she could look at the shelf in the top of the closet. “Okay, not that I’m complaining here, but this isn’t exactly what I had in mind when I pictured you on top of me.”

“Shush it.” His lips pursed, hands coming up to grasp her thighs in order to keep her steady as she continued her search. She lets out a breathy _ah-ha_ when she finds whatever she’s looking for, dropping gracefully back to her feet and kicking the door shut yet again. He scowled, seeing her struggle into the tightly-fit costume that hugged every curve and made him want nothing more than to throw Dick out of the apartment and take Anne up against a wall.

“Hey, I’m grabbing Trapper,” Dick calls from the living room. “He’ll probably be the only thing that keeps Tim and Damian from fighting!”

“Good idea!” There another moment of struggle as Anne pulled on a pair of boots before she was sprinting out of the room. Jason waited a good five minutes after the front door was shut before attempting to leave the closet, which was probably the worst thing he could’ve done. There was a reason they left the closet door open all the time, if it was closed for long, it refused to open again. In fact, the stupid thing _locked_.

Jason Peter Todd was locked in a goddamn closet and he couldn’t even break it open because then he’d have a hundred and eighty pounds of angry woman beating him with a pillow for ruining her door. He’d really like to avoid that at all costs at this point.

So he’d yelled for help for three hours before the idiot next door turned his music down enough to actually hear anything—it was In the Mood again, Rhett’s obsession with big bands coming back full force after a disastrous visit from his mother. There was a faint thud from a swivel chair toppling backward, the sound of a door being flung open and footsteps in the hall, and then just ten and a half second later, Rhett Bartley was peering through the slats of the door.

“Jason,” he asked, confusion coloring his voice. “Uh, why are you in there?”

“Anne pushed me in here to avoid Dick seeing us.”

“Is Dick her brother?”

“Pretty much.” _More a pain in my ass than anything_ , Jason adds silently, arms crossed over his broad chest. “Get me out of here.” Rhett leaned closer, one bright green eye studying him the way a starving animal would study a potential target. That’s about the time Jason remembered just how much he and Rhett despised each other, a full second before the other man just walked out of the apartment altogether without even a taunt thrown over his shoulder. “Bartley! Get me out of here or, I swear, I’ll throw all of your computers out a window!”

Swing music started up again, loud enough to drown out all of Gotham and especially Jason’s threats. That’s how time passed until well after midnight, Anne stumbling home and giggling at every little thing, Trapper pattering after her into the bedroom. From what Jason could see, it looked like she was attempting to dance along with the music from Rhett’s apartment, though she was too drunk to find any sort of rhythm.

“Baby,” Jason yelled, beating a fist against the door. “Anne, let me out of here!” The door opens a moment later, leaving him staring with slight wonder at his very drunk, very happy girlfriend. Her pale cheeks were flushed a dark red as she grins up at him, unsteady in the boots she wore.

It took him a moment before he realized she was dressed up as Catwoman 2.0, otherwise known as Maggie Kyle. The latter had taken up the mantle after Selina disappeared some two months or so ago, occasionally coming to visit in order to escape Bane’s mothering. She also had an impressive reserve of cat sweaters. Why his girlfriend decided to go as Maggie for Halloween, he’d never know.

“What took you so long?”

“I was decorating,” she said, words slurred and sometimes joining together. “And then I was giving out candy, and then I was drinking tequila with Kory and Raven.” She gives an overdramatic shrug, leaning against him for some support since her legs her trying to give out on her. “It was awesome, you should’a came!”

“I was locked in a closet all night. Besides, everyone at that party thinks I’m dead still, remember?” Anne giggles, eyelids starting to droop. “Okay, party girl, let’s get you in bed.” She doesn’t protest or fight him as he scoops her up, depositing her on the bed and beginning to peel the costume off her. _How Maggie can stand to wear this all the time is beyond me_.

Once he had a nightgown on her and turned her on her side, he kicked off his jeans and joined her beneath the blankets. She snuggled back against him, letting out a content sound once he had an arm wrapped around her waist.

“Sweet dreams, Jason.”

“Sweet dreams, Annie.”

**Author's Note:**

> As a thank you for helping me work on my Rose Red story, I thought I'd write something fun and Jason-filled!


End file.
